Teaching Swimming -- Trials and Rewards

Last week, for the first time, I had such a difficult time teaching swimming that I wondered if I would be able to continue.  Given how weak I felt, I did not know until this morning if I would be up for teaching today.  Even if I could manage to teach, I worried that it would take everything out of me and leave me like a rag again.

In the end, I felt OK, so I decided to teach, and I am so glad!

I had amazing classes!!

My beginners all accomplished a new step forward and we were all so excited!

My advanced swimmers worked hard and had a very productive lesson as well.

Of course I felt tired afterwards, but I also felt great!

I love teaching and days like today make all the efforts worthwhile!!



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

The Easy Life.... NOT!

I put on two pain patches yesterday morning, but I am still in a lot of pain.  I woke up multiple times in the middle of the night from pain, and this morning I woke up in agony.  The pain just got worse as the day progressed.

In addition to the patches, I took a Percocet.  I took a whole pill and even that did not alleviate the pain, though it made the pain bearable.

I do not know how I managed to teach swimming today, but I did.

My final class is for advanced swimmers and I teach that class from outside of the water.

Today, I pulled a chair up to the edge of the pool and gave my comments to the kids while sitting down.

One of the parents commented to me that this must be the "best job."

I was not sure what she meant, so she explained "sitting out in the sun, teaching swimming." 
Anyone who has seen me teach knows that I am usually running up and down alongside the lane, giving the kids instruction.  I might sit for a few minutes, but I am 100% with the kids.

Today, I sat because I could not stand.  I could barely manage to sit.

I did not want to elaborate about how much I was in pain, or explain that that was why I was "lounging" by the side of the pool.

I laughed off the comment, but it stuck with me.  I know she did not mean anything negative, but it struck a nerve.

I was not in full form today.  I had a very tough time concentrating on the kids.  I was so unbearably in pain.

When class finally ended, I dragged myself to the changing rooms. 

When I left, I had to ask someone to help me carry my pool bag up the stairs to the exit. I could barely walk.  I did not even want to drive, but I had no choice.

I just wanted to get home so I could take more Percocet.

My oncologist advised me to add another patch and take as much Percocet as I needed.  I no longer cared whether or not the drugs made me woozy (they did not), I just wanted to get out of pain.

My oncologist wants me to come in tomorrow morning to do some scans. He does not usually see patients on Tuesdays.

I am worried.  All this pain cannot be good.


Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

Super Mom (Proud Parenting Moments)

I did something a bit crazy irresponsible today, but it worked out fine, and it was so worth it.

My youngest stayed home sick today.

I was not sure if she was really sick or just feeling a bit overwhelmed.  She had her group interview yesterday, for the Jr. High she wants to attend.  She is worried about them not accepting her.  I know that she will be accepted, but my reassurances do not seem to relieve the pressure she feels.  She thinks:  I'm her mom;  of course I think she's great and will get in.  (The truth is, I really do know that she will get in.  Getting accepted is not as hard as people like to make it out to be. I'm confident enough not to be worried.)

Anyway, back to the present.  My daugher does not like to miss school; so if she asks to stay home, it makes sense to let her.

The thing is, I knew I would be out all day.

I had a morning art class, followed by Chi Kong, at Beit Natan.  Then, a meeting of the editorial staff for the first edition of the Beit Natan newsletter.  (Since I write, I was recruited.)

After that, I planned to go straight from Beit Natan to the pool, to teach.

I left Beit Natan at 2:50 and my first swim class begins at 3:30.  Forty minutes is not a lot of time to cross town, park, change, and get in the pool.

But I made really good time, and arrived in Talpiot, around 3:05.  At the traffic light on Derech Hevron, I should have turned left, to go to the pool.  Instead, I turned right and headed home. (not a rational choice)

I pulled into our parking lot at 3:11.  I figured I had exactly 3 minutes to run in, see how my daughter was feeling, and, if she was up to it (this is a good example of my typical wishful thinking), to bring her to the pool with me.

My daughter still did not feel well, and I think she was running a low fever.  Coming to the pool with me was out of the question. 

But stopping at home was a really good decision.  She really appreciated that I came home just to check on her.  She understood that I could not stay. 

With a quick kiss and a hug, I ran out, hopped in my car, and prayed not to get stuck behind some slow vehicle.  It was 3:15.

God was good to me. 

I parked my car at 3:22 and was in the pool by 3:30, on the dot.

Piece o' cake.



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

Validation

I have been teaching swimming since I was twelve.  I'll save you the math -- it's been 31 years.

I have taught hundreds of kids, and tens of adults.  I have had students of all ages and all levels, from 3 months to 65 years, from beginners to advanced swimmers.

I teach all stroke forms, water survival, and even a bit of water ballet.  I focus on improving technique and endurance.

The one thing I do not teach is competitive swim.

All my kids know how to swim.  They have been in the water since they were babies.

This year, both my eldest daughter and my son have not attended swimming classes regularly; they are too busy and get out of school too late.

At the beginning of this year, my son expressed his intention to go swimming on his own, in the mornings, before school.  His stated goal:  to work out for half a year, then join the swim team.

The task turned out to be more challenging than he expected (for all sorts of reasons).  He did not make it to the pool very often.

Two weeks ago, after Breichat Yerushalayim (The Jerusalem Pool) closed for the winter, HaPoel Yerushalayim (The Jerusalem Swim Team) started training at Ramat Rachel (the pool where I teach).

My son decided to try out for the team.  This past Monday, he rushed to the pool, after school.

The coach watched him swim.

When my son got out of the pool, the coach told him, and me, that his technique is good, but that he needs to work on building up his stamina.

That my son needed to work on his endurance came as no surprise. He has not really been swimming since last year.

Last year, mid-year, when I had to switch chemo days from Tuesdays to Thursdays, I had to move all my swimming classes from Thursdays to Mondays. Unfortunately, my son had sayarut (scouts) on Mondays and could not get to the pool on time.

What I was not expecting, was to hear how good his form was.

The style I teach is different from the way the kids on the team swim.  Also, when I see my son swim, there are all sorts of little details that I see, that need improvement.

As my son was swimming for the coach, one of the older kids on the team commented that my son has a strong back (it is unclear if he was referring to my son's back or his backstroke); either way, it was clearly a complement.

Then, the coach noted my son's good technique.

I have been teaching the same form for the last 31 years. Recently, I started wondering if the style I teach might be outdated.

It was so nice to get positive feedback from a serious trainer.

I feel validated.



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

You Know I'm Really Sick When....

I cancel swimming lessons!

I debated all last night and all this morning. I knew what I should do, I just did not want to do it. So, I put off the decision until the very last minute, hoping that I would miraculously get better and be able to teach swimming.

I have been sick (AGAIN!), since last week. No fever, nothing horrible, just a non-stop runny nose and a post-nasal-drip cough (the cough sometimes seems a little too deep in my chest -- if I am not better by tomorrow, I might actually go see a doctor). Oh yeah, and on Shabbat I had no voice (again!).

Anyway, I knew I really should cancel swimming lessons, but I really did not want to.

Eventually, I just could not ignore the fact that I still had only half a voice, my congestion was driving me crazy, I still had somewhat regular coughing fits, and I just plain did not feel well!

So, I emailed and called all my parents. to let them know that we would not be having any more swimming lessons until after Pesach (Passover). All my parents were supportive and understanding, as I knew they would be. But I was still bummed.

I knew it was the right decision, but I did not like it. In addition to everything else, I am getting chemo a day early and need my blood count to be good. Also, Pesach is in a week and I don't want to spend it sick in bed!

So, I did the responsible, grown-up thing to do.

Now, I am going to crawl back into bed with my tissues and a good book!





Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

The Best Children in The Whole Wide World

I was so cold after teaching swimming, I could not wait to get into a hot shower. As I gathered up my things, Y came to tell me that one of my student wants to tell me something.

I went back to see what she wanted. Suddenly, my kids and my students start singing "Happy Birthday" to me.

I have a sneaky daughter!

--------------------------------------------------

Moshe and I decided to get the kids pizza for dinner.

Moshe and I went out to a restaurant.

It was late when Y called to ask when we were coming home. We thought it was sweet that she wanted us home. It was more than sweet.

When we got home, Moshe called me over to see something. I opened the door to my room.... The beds were made, there were presents on my bed, and the walls were covered in signs filled with jokes and birthday wishes.

I have the best kids in the whole wide world!!



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

Catching Up

I thought that when I came home from the retreat, I would spend the afternoon catching up with my kids and doing some of those things that need to get done.

Silly me.

I greeted my kids, gave and received hugs, heard a bit about what they had to say, and fell into bed. I slept for three hours! I woke for a bit, had dinner with my kids, and went back to sleep.

The next day I had chemo. I don't remember what I did afterwards. I meant to sleep, but that did not happen.

Friday, I managed to cook for Shabbat, and then I slept all Shabbat. In the afternoon, Moshe suggested we listen to MD read the first aliyah (section) of his Torah reading. I really wanted to sleep, but how could I say no? What a pleasure! I did not expect him to read so nicely. Then Moshe went to lie down and I stayed with MD to listen again, and help improve his reading. It was a really nice time together.

I had wanted to teach my son to read, but I just could not find the time and energy to do it. So, one of our neighbors is teaching him. It was nice to have a chance to teach my son, without the pressure of having to teach him. He is just beginning....

Saturday night, we ALL watched Star Trek. What a treat to have Y with us as well.

Then Moshe wanted to go out to see "Two Legacies," Einat Kapach's documentary film about her grandparents, the Rabbanit Kapach, famous for her many acts of chessed (righteous deeds), and Rav Yosef Kapach z"l, who was the foremost authority on the Rambam. I could have easily just gone to bed. Instead, despite the rain, we went to the Cinemateque. Only an hour long, the film was very interesting, and beautifully done, but too short. I was glad we went. (Added bonus: there was handicapped parking right in front, so we did not have to walk too far in the rain!)

Sunday was a crazy day. In the afternoon, I went to Ofek (the city's gifted and talented program), for the end of the semester presentations. This semester, MD learned robotics and juggling. Every week, he brings home a Diablo and practices in all his free time. He is really quite good.

I had arranged for MD to get a ride home with someone so that I could go straight to my support group. The program at Ofek ended at 6:00 and my support group began at 6:00. My plan was to zip over to my group.

Then I spaced out! There is no other explanation for what happened next besides chemo brain.

After Ofek, I couldn't figure out why I was so pressured, since I had plenty of time to get to my support group by 8:00. I could have even taken my son home, and come back again. The wires in my brain were completely crossed! I confused the ending time of my support group with the beginning time.

At 6:30, my friend TK called to see if I was coming to the group. I answered "Of course! I'll see you at 8:00!" She started laughing. Only then, I realize what happened.

I arrived an hour late. Suffice it to say that I was unable to raise all those topics that I had been waiting to talk about! How frustrating!! The discussion that we had was interesting (about priorities and making time for the people who are most important to us -- our husbands and kids), but it was not the discussion I had wanted to have. Also, you would not think it would be so hard to drop what we are doing and pay attention to those nearest and dearest, but it is. At least, it is for all of us. The facilitator made certain that we ended the meeting with practical suggestions, shifting the focus from what we are doing "wrong," to what we can be doing better.

Monday, I was still so tired. The thought even flitted across my mind to cancel lessons. I am so glad that I did not. My classes were AMAZING!! So many of my kids had the best lessons that they have had to date! I felt so wonderful after class!

And here we are.

It is Tuesday afternoon and my house is quiet. MD just went off for his Bar Mitzvah lessons. The girls are out on "netiyot" (tree planting for Tu B'Shvat, even though Tu B'Shvat is not until next week) with their youth group. (These days, both girls are in Ezra. A joined Ezra, to be with her older sister. Y is happy to have her little sister in the same youth group, and she really looks after her. It works for me!)

In theory, I could sleep or get something done.



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

Crazy Days: I don't have time to be sick, there is too much to do!

5:00 in the morning, I woke up coughing my head off. Finally, I got out of bed to take some cough syrup and suck on a heavy duty cough drop. For lack of anything better to do, I surfed the web while waiting for the cough syrup to kick in.

For those of you who don't know me so well, I am definitely a night owl. I NEVER get up that early in the morning!! In fact, I often sleep 'till 9:00, and that has nothing to do with chemo!

By the time I was ready to go back to bed, the kids were up and the house was rocking!! I lay down in bed and waited for the quiet.... then.... ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz

At around 10:00, someone called (the nerve!!) and that was it, I was up.

Then, the big question: do I teach swimming today??

I did not feel well, but I hate cancelling class. And I already cancelled swimming for next week (I am going away, on the Beit Natan winter retreat)

I kept putting off the decision, thinking that maybe I'd feel better in a few hours. Meanwhile, I spent the time taking care of paperwork that had been piling up. (there is still a lot more to go, but I did enought to feel productive!). Luckily, I could do most of the work sitting down.

I finally decided to consult my GP. He is always advising me not to go in the water when I am sick (and I almost always badger him with questions until he cedes that it is probably ok if I do it anyway).

Wouldn't you know it? When my doctor called me back, he said it was ok for me to go in the water! He said it sounded like I have sinusitis that is getting better by itself. While there is a chance that going in the water can make it worse, if that happens, he'll just treat it with antibiotics. He told me that it might take another week before I feel better and suggested that I do not limit my activities.

What a dilemma!!

By the time I decided that I should follow my instincts and cancel class anyway, it was too late. Trying to do the juggling to cancel class was more difficult than just showing up and teaching! So, I went.

Like always, once I got in the water and started teaching, I felt better! But, I must admit that after 45 minutes in the water, I started to get a bit chilled. And by the time I was done with my third class, I was downright cold!

I took a quick break, and stood under a steaming shower for 3 minutes. I would have loved to stay longer, but I did not want to keep my kids waiting (especially since I did not want to stay too late).

Today, thank God, I brought a robe to wear so I would not get chilled when I got out of the pool to teach my advanced swimmers.

I was also really disciplined and talked really quietly during all my classes, so as not to strain my voice even further. (I have a voice again, but it still hurts a bit when I talk)

Unfortunately, my kids were less than cooperative today, and I did not have the patience to deal with them. Why is it that it is harder to teach my own kids than anyone else's?!? When I tell other kids to do things, they do it. Today, my kids argued with every single instruction! (ok, not all my kids, and not with every instruction, but you get the idea!)

After swimming, I raced home, to get ready for a Bat Mitzvah.

We ended up arriving almost an hour and a half late. The Bat Mitzvah was in The Gush, in Alon Shvut. We have known the parents, S&DK for many years. Over the years, we have stayed in touch, often meeting at political demonstrations and Manhigut Yehudit conferences. It was a very moving to be a part of their simcha (celebration). Besides shared political convictions, we share a more difficult experience.

After I was diagnosed this time, I decided that I would daven (pray) for other cancer patients. For many months, I davenned for DK's father, z"l, who passed away just over a year ago.

Sharing an illness creates strong bonds. To some degree, it gives you a glimpse into the depths of another person's soul. There are feelings we all experience, that are an inevitable part of dealing with a terminal disease.

Though I do not talk about it often, death is a shadow that is ever-present in my life.

I like the new terminology, that cancer is a "chronic" disease. But, let's be honest, it doesn't get better. (at least, not yet... not until we get that miracle)

But tonight was not a sad night. Tonight was a joyous celebration of life and coming of age.

May we all merit to share many more happy occasions together!!



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

"If Your Head Was Not Attached to Your Neck...."

"If your head was not attached to your neck," my mother would admonish me, "you would forget that too."

As a kid, I resented it. As an adult, I reluctantly admit it is true.


This morning, I did not feel well. I wanted to nap, but there was too much to do. I was busy with a thousand things when I realized that I had to get going or I would be late to the pool. I arrived, just minutes before my first class, and got a parking space right in front of the entrance (the first good thing that happened today). As I removed my keys from the ignition, I looked to my right and noticed... my pool bag was not there.

No pool bag = no swim suit = no lessons.

I had no choice; I had to go back home to get my pool bag.

I sent A into the pool, to tell my student. Then I pulled out of my perfect parking space, knowing that it would not be there when I returned.

I was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!

What could I do? I called my sister.

Thank God for sisters!

She was having a pretty bad day too. But, after hearing about mine, she said "you win!" At least I made her smile (and maybe even feel better)!

My sister is a really good listener. She always knows just what to say!

I am a fixer. My sister is a listener. (You can't always fix things, but you can always listen. I can learn a lot from my sister.)

My sister listens... empathizes... and, when appropriate, laughs.

I felt much better when I got off the phone.


Alas, my day's mishaps were not yet over.

On the way home from the pool, I phoned my son at his friend's home, and instructed him to meet me on the corner.

A few minutes later, as I am driving down Derech Hevron, my daughter asked "why didn't you pick up MD?"

I could not believe that I forgot to pick him up!


My mother's words rang in my ears.


It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I think I lost my head in Australia.



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

Post-Purim Playfulness

One of my swimming students is a very serious girl.

It is clear that she takes everything, not just her swimming lessons, seriously.

So when she kept laughing during yesterday's lesson, I asked "what's up?"

"Purim," she responded, laughing.

What could I say?

I just laughed along with her!


Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA