The Bar Mitzvah is Coming -- ready or not!!

My “plan” had been to “get through” all the end-of-the-year stuff and then focus on my son's bar mitzvah.

Of course, discovering brain mets less than a week before school ended stuck a real wrench into that plan!

I started radiation the first day of summer vacation!!

The almost immediate exhaustion hit me by surprise. I kept telling myself, I’ll start working on the bar mitzvah tomorrow…. hopefully I’ll be less tired then….

Yeah, right.

So, here we are and time is running out. After weeks of nothing moving, everything is moving forward, full speed ahead!

I am too tired to keep up!!

Those of you who do not know me personally might have figured out by now that I am definitely a “Type A” personality (those of you, who do know me, figured this out a long time ago). Among other characteristics, I’m a control freak.

Now, knowing that you have to let go of some of that control and actually letting go are two completely different ballgames!

So many wonderful people offered to help me, but I was too tired to even get them organized!! I did not know what to do with all those general offers to help. (Though I did think to ask people to bake for the Kiddush -- at least my brain has not retired completely!)

Thanks to a session with my OT, I made a list of things-to-do and figured out what I could give over to someone else.

I gave over so much already, and I’m still giving over more!

I am grateful for all the help offered by friends, family and acquaintances.

My sister-in-law (SIL) called almost every day, begging for more things to do! She made a MILLION calls to halls, caterers, family, friends, etc. (Did I mention that she has seven small kids of her own?!?)

My sister, SIL, and mother-and-father-in-law (MIL & FIL) all took various kids shopping for clothes for the simcha (celebration) – not an easy task and one that I DREADED!!

Oh yeah, and did I mention that my in-laws, when they first learned of my diagnosis, three days before they were going to fly to America, CANCELLED their trip so they could be here to help us!!

I am truly blessed.

Meanwhile, my son knows his parsha (Torah reading) and his haftorah, and that is really all that matters!



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

"If Your Head Was Not Attached to Your Neck...."

"If your head was not attached to your neck," my mother would admonish me, "you would forget that too."

As a kid, I resented it. As an adult, I reluctantly admit it is true.


This morning, I did not feel well. I wanted to nap, but there was too much to do. I was busy with a thousand things when I realized that I had to get going or I would be late to the pool. I arrived, just minutes before my first class, and got a parking space right in front of the entrance (the first good thing that happened today). As I removed my keys from the ignition, I looked to my right and noticed... my pool bag was not there.

No pool bag = no swim suit = no lessons.

I had no choice; I had to go back home to get my pool bag.

I sent A into the pool, to tell my student. Then I pulled out of my perfect parking space, knowing that it would not be there when I returned.

I was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day!

What could I do? I called my sister.

Thank God for sisters!

She was having a pretty bad day too. But, after hearing about mine, she said "you win!" At least I made her smile (and maybe even feel better)!

My sister is a really good listener. She always knows just what to say!

I am a fixer. My sister is a listener. (You can't always fix things, but you can always listen. I can learn a lot from my sister.)

My sister listens... empathizes... and, when appropriate, laughs.

I felt much better when I got off the phone.


Alas, my day's mishaps were not yet over.

On the way home from the pool, I phoned my son at his friend's home, and instructed him to meet me on the corner.

A few minutes later, as I am driving down Derech Hevron, my daughter asked "why didn't you pick up MD?"

I could not believe that I forgot to pick him up!


My mother's words rang in my ears.


It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I think I lost my head in Australia.



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA