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Monday, July 12, 2010

The Easy Life.... NOT!

I put on two pain patches yesterday morning, but I am still in a lot of pain.  I woke up multiple times in the middle of the night from pain, and this morning I woke up in agony.  The pain just got worse as the day progressed.

In addition to the patches, I took a Percocet.  I took a whole pill and even that did not alleviate the pain, though it made the pain bearable.

I do not know how I managed to teach swimming today, but I did.

My final class is for advanced swimmers and I teach that class from outside of the water.

Today, I pulled a chair up to the edge of the pool and gave my comments to the kids while sitting down.

One of the parents commented to me that this must be the "best job."

I was not sure what she meant, so she explained "sitting out in the sun, teaching swimming." 
Anyone who has seen me teach knows that I am usually running up and down alongside the lane, giving the kids instruction.  I might sit for a few minutes, but I am 100% with the kids.

Today, I sat because I could not stand.  I could barely manage to sit.

I did not want to elaborate about how much I was in pain, or explain that that was why I was "lounging" by the side of the pool.

I laughed off the comment, but it stuck with me.  I know she did not mean anything negative, but it struck a nerve.

I was not in full form today.  I had a very tough time concentrating on the kids.  I was so unbearably in pain.

When class finally ended, I dragged myself to the changing rooms. 

When I left, I had to ask someone to help me carry my pool bag up the stairs to the exit. I could barely walk.  I did not even want to drive, but I had no choice.

I just wanted to get home so I could take more Percocet.

My oncologist advised me to add another patch and take as much Percocet as I needed.  I no longer cared whether or not the drugs made me woozy (they did not), I just wanted to get out of pain.

My oncologist wants me to come in tomorrow morning to do some scans. He does not usually see patients on Tuesdays.

I am worried.  All this pain cannot be good.

Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,


tesyaa said...

Feel better! I take it as a good sign that you were able to blog about this experience :)

mikimi said...

I wish I could take away all your pain and tumors-forever!

Robin said...

Thinking of you and holding you close in my heart.


Cheryl Pitt said...

Love, prayers and optimism from me to you!

Shira Salamone said...

Oy. Wishing you a pain-free future, preferably as soon as possible.

You're on my r'faeinu list.

EstyB. said...

I dont usually comment on this blog, although I come here nearly every day to read. I just wanted to let you know how much courage and inspiration this blog has given me. Thank Gd I'm not facing a health crisis as tough as yours, but your kind of inspiration is helpful in any and every situation

Thinking many healing thought!

faith/emuna said...

praying for you, as always. please update when you come home from the doctor. and try to drink alot, it is really hot.

Bernie said...

No pain is not good, I am glad you are seeing your doctor tomorrow.

How wonderful you were to teach swimming today, putting others before yourself RivkA....I think it is time you put yourself first for a while my friend.

Good Luck with your doctor's appointment, am keeping you in my heart and prayers.....:-) Hugs

Rahel Jaskow said...

Thinking of you, Rivka, and sending hugs.

Bernie said...

My comment should read:

No.....any pain is definitely not good.

Sorry, I messed it up, big hugs

Sarah said...

Thinking of you and praying for you!

What strikes me about the mom's comment is that even if you are totally healthy, teaching is never an easy job. You have to be so "on." Especially when you are watching kids in a pool of water! Just because it looks like someone is sitting and not doing much doesn't mean their wheels aren't turning a mile a minute.

Anonymous said...

hope the pain gets better soon.
re- the pool thing: when someone doesn't recognise the very thing you put the most effort into it hurts - not surprising considering the investment you made... (even when "they don't mean anything by it").
appreciating the effort she can see (like when she sees you running all over on other days) should have tipped her off.
that said, the kids certainly know!

love, hugs, and healing thoughts

Leah Goodman said...


Anonymous said...

Ugh. I'm sorry about the pain. Glad you're going to see the doc. I'm sending you good pain-free thoughts. And I thought you handled the mom's comment beautifully. :) Sometimes people are not as perceptive as we'd like them to be.