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Sunday, February 14, 2010

A Little Down

I thought our appointment with my oncologist was just fine, 'till he turned to me and noted, "You're looking a little down."

I asked Moshe about it afterwards, and he concurred.

I guess I am still struggling to keep my spirits up.  It is really hard.

First of all, I am still feeling overwhelmed by all there is to do.  Things just move so slowly. 

I have friends who have offered to help, but I cannot even get it together to call them.

I feel like I am treading water all the time.  I put in so much effort, yet I barely manage to stay afloat.  Some days, I feel like I am drowning.

I have always struggled with issues of order and organization. 

Cancer has made it just that much harder.



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

14 comments:

rickismom said...

HUGS! Wish it was easier for you.

Liba said...

I wish I had been more cheerful today.

Staying Afloat said...

Hatzlachah. Everyone feels a little down sometimes.

Denise said...

I think you have what to be down about, but its all in your attitude. Try to turn things around and see how good you are in so many other things. Organization is just not your bag. So who cares. Pick up the phone, call those wonderful gals, and have a great time doing the organizing together. Youll all have a laugh,and youll feel great! Im rooting for you!!

Melissa said...

I'm with Denise. Call your friends. Spending time with them will lift your spirits.

That disease cannot take the power of friendship away.

And you know what? You lifted my spirits about telling me about your baking and cooking, or should I say, not baking and cooking.

So, go call your friends and have some fun.

Mottel said...

Keep strong - we care and think about you all the time!

MommaMindy said...

Your friends love you and want to bless you by cleaning, organizing, cooking. It's OK to ask, even if you don't know what to ask for. They'll come in and do what they do best. Don't deny them the opportunity to bless you! Thanks for you honesty. It helps us all to be real.

michele said...

RivkA, I think I'll be available later in the week to help you with whatever. Let me know. You can reach me at michele@netmedia.net.il

RivkA with a capital A said...

Ricki's mom -- hugs are always good, even when they are virtual!

Liba -- NO GUILT!! You made me smile! There has to be room for ALL of our feelings and experiences, otherwise it's not real.

Staying Afloat -- true. It can be hard, sometimes, to know what are "normal" mood swings vs. how much the cancer is influencing me.

Denise -- You are so right. But sometimes I just get weighted down....

Melissa -- THANK YOU -- your post certainly made me smile with empathy!

Mottel -- I'm trying!

Momma Mindy -- You make it sound so easy....

Michele -- you don't know what you're in for... it's not too late to change your mind...

Shevy said...

RivkA, it can be very hard to let others help with the clutter but when you do it, it will feel like someone has just lifted hundreds of pounds/kilos off your back.

My suggestions would be first, to have people help you with what they're best at. One person may be great at setting up your laundry area, eliminating the backlog, reorganizing your closets & drawers and helping you to get rid of the items that are no longer working for you. Another may be wonderful with kitchen cabinets. A third may be a wiz at handling paper piles.

The second thing would be to take a little time looking around your place, figuring out several areas that would make the biggest difference if they were taken care of. I like to have one area in each room that can kind of act as an "island of order" in the midst of chaos. Then you try to gradually expand that little island into a bigger one.

Finally, dealing with some of this may really lift your mood.

Good luck! I'm rooting for you.

Henya said...

just sending you a hug.

Anonymous said...

more virtual hugs heading your way!

love
BW

Hasya Ya'ara said...

RivkA,

I will e-mail you. Keep a look out for it. It's on it's way soon.

Thank you so much for writing me on my blog. Sometimes, I feel disheartened that no one writes. Oh well, there's more to life than my blog. At least through it, I have met you. Yeah!

RivkA with a capital A said...

Shevy -- greate advice! now, if I can only put it into action....

Henya & BW -- love those hugs!!

Hasya Ya'ara -- thanks for your email. I am fascinated by your journey and appreciate how you share your feelings and experiences so openly.