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Sunday, December 27, 2009


***** warning: this post is about feeling sick to your stomach *****

I used to avoid throwing up at all costs.

Moshe would see me lying in bed, suffering, and encourage me to "get up and throw up," because I would almost certainly "feel better afterwards."

I would continue to lie in bed, focussing on breathing slowly, maybe even sipping some water, praying to fall asleep and wake up after the nausea has passed.  This method usually worked for me.

I did not get nauseas that often... before chemotherapy.

Now, I walk around with Pramin (anti-nausea medication).  I do not need it often, but feeling nauseas is no longer such a rare experience.

Last night, I knew that Moshe's approach would help me.

After tossing and turning for about half an hour, I finally got out of bed, dragged myself to the bathroom, and allowed myself to throw up.

It freaked me out a little.

It felt a little bulemic -- eat too much, then throw it up.

I didn't have to do anything gross.  I just opened my mouth and did not fight to hold anything in.  It is quite amazing, how things just flow in the wrong direction.

Chemotherapy really messes with my insides.

Despite the icky feeling of throwing up, I did feel better afterwards.

I went back to bed and fell asleep almost as soon as I my head met my pillow.

Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,


mikimi said...

when i throw up, it often tastes the same going out as it did coming in.
hope you are feeling better.

Anonymous said...

I remember once when I was 4 months pregnant I ate WAY too much at an event, and the inevitable result was throwing up, a lot -- I more or less learned my lession after that.

Feel better...

Renee said...

Oh darling RivkA. I hear you too well.

Throwing up use to put me in bed for three days, now I throw up and continue talking (not quite of course but you get the drift). It is part of a horrible thing that we do now.

I love your picture you are beautiful and I am mad that you are so young and you have this bastard of a disease.

I am happy that the girls are close and I understand the worry about your son being included too. I also have two daughters and one son. I get it.

Do you have kytril there for nausea, I know there is now even one better, but I can't remember the name.

Love Renee xoxo

Baila said...

Sometime a good vomit just hits the spot. :-)

Hope you are feeling better...

Rahel Jaskow said...

On rare occasions, I get a migraine accompanied by nausea. I've learned to just let the nausea take its course and keep a bucket nearby just in case. I always feel better afterwards.

Mottel said...

I also hate throwing up . . . but on the (thank G-d) rare occasions that I have lately, I've stopped fighting it. In a gross way, it feels so much better.
Stay strong and feel better!

Jo said...

Sometimes I see not being able to have chemo as a good thing because of this same reason. I do everything I can do avoid throwing up. There are times I can't eat without throwing up and it's the worst thing ever. I do the deep breathing and everything too. lol.

You are in my thoughts and I'm sorry sweety. Big hugz.

RivkA with a capital A said...

So glad I did not gross everyone out too much with this post!