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Thursday, July 9, 2009

Telling the Kids... Or Not... ? -- Shabbat

This is what went on two weeks ago, when I first learned about my brain mets.

Friday, we were all busy with our usual Friday activities. We did not have time for a serious sit down conversation.

That afternoon, the kids all did their chores pretty nicely. Even our child, who tends to drag out his/her* chore, actually did the chore with almost no complaining. *(you did not think I would give it away, did you?)

I was especially excited. My soul sister from Kibbutz Sde Eliyahu was coming for Shabbat!! Her husband went abroad for business and she chose to spend her free Shabbat with me! I could not wait!!

My mother in law had offered to come for Shabbat and to bring all the food. It was an amazingly generous and thoughtful offer! She was quite surprised when I asked to put her off one week. In hindsight, I think she also felt the need to be close during those initial days of turmoil.

But a chance to spend all Shabbat with my girlfriend does not come every day! I wasn't going to let anything deprive me of that, not even cancer!

So, rather than focussing on my new diagnosis, I had a wonderful Shabbat with my friend and family. I spent a lot of time with my friend. I also did a lot of listening, which was really good for both of us. Only towards the end of Shabbat did I find an opportunity to share my news with her. We did not talk about it much, because my kids still did not know.

I began to think that maybe I could put off telling my kids until after my son's end of the year play....

Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,


Daria said...

My heart goes out to you. These are not easy decisions.

muse said...

Your strength, and normalicy for your kids, comes from the fact that you aren't letting the cancer take over every aspect of your life.