Rosh HaShanah Preparations -- Where the Magic Begins

When we left, not much food was prepared.  Out of 6 meals -- we were invited for two, friends prepared one meal, and my sister prepared another -- that left 2 more meals to be prepared by my aspiring chef, i.e. my 12 year old daughter.

We met my neighbor on the way out the door, as we were leaving for the hospital, and I asked my son to mention to her where we were going and if she could stop by to check on my daughter from time to time, to see if she needed any help/advice with the cooking.

We also tried to reach my sister, who would be joining us for the first day of Yom Tov, to see if she could come early to help, given the current situation (that I was going to the hospital, mere hours before the holiday began).  We discovered later that my sister, who had prepared everything in advance, was out of town for the day.

When we returned from the hospital, to find the house peaceful and all set up, we assumed that our neighbor and my sister were responsible.  They were both quick to inform us that our kids had really done it all.  The kids had worked together and made it happen.

In fact, the kids even handled a small crisis (a grease fire in one of the cooking pots) calmly and responsibly.

When push came to shove, there was no pushing and no shoving.  Our kids cooperated and helped each other and did what needed to be done.

As we sat down together, to share the first festive meal, we thanked the children for pulling it all together, feeling both proud and extremely grateful.

I felt accutely aware of all the blessings surrounding me: my children, my sister, my husband.

God has blessed me with the greatest gifts of all. 

I was tired, I was weak, but I was home with my family.

There is no better way to start the NewYear.


Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

School has Started!

My eldest started last Thursday, and my other two started on Sunday.

I got all their school supplies and have almost finished gathering all their school books.  Most of the school books we either had or are borrowing from friends.  There are still a few that we will have to buy.  I still need to ask a friend to actually go and get those for me, but I am waiting to be certain of what we need, so we only have to go to the bookstore once!

So far, everyone seems to be settling in. Even the madhouse morning rush seems to be under control.

My sweet son asked for me to make his lunches for him again, this year.

It is too much for me to do it all year long.  But I told him I would make his lunches in the morning for the first week of school, then I would make his lunches *with him* in the evenings during the second week of school.  After that, he would have to make his lunches in the evening on his own (though I will help him if he needs/wants it, within reason).  He agreed.  I am cautiously optimistic that we can make this transition smoothly.... (PLEASE, God!!)

Moshe has been driving the kids to school in the mornings, which is very positive for all around.  My son, who mainly rides his bike to and from school, also benefits from this arrangement.  My son loads his bike onto the car; Moshe drives him to the top of our hill, which is long and steep; then our son rides the rest of the way to school.  It cuts out the worst/hardest part of the bike ride, but still allows our son to benefit from the excersize of bike riding, and the freedom after school to ride wherever he wants.

Our youngest began a new school this year and is feeling more comfortable, with each day that passes.  She bravely chose a school that was clearly the best choice for her, but to which NOT ONE of her friends chose to attend.  She is excited to be learning with her previous drama teacher (who really is fantastic) and there is even a chance that she will continue learning with her previous English teacher (of whom we are also big fans).  So far, her mechanechet (main teacher) and her class seems nice, but it is really too early to tell.

Our eldest is getting used to some of the changes in her school.  She loved her mechanechet for 9th and 10th grade, but they get a new mechanechet for 11th and 12th. Her new teacher is actually one of the top women educators in Jerusalem, but I am not sure my daughter appreciates that yet.  I, on the other hand, am thrilled (and jealous!).  She also has a new math teacher, about which we are less excited, but still cautiously optimistic. Her previous math teacher really suited her, and that is no small feat!   Our daughter just need to pass the next two units of her bagrut (matriculation) exams and then she is finished with math classes forever.

The best news is that due to a scheduling conflict between her two majors, theater and art, she might be able to just take the art workshops, which really excite her, and not art history, which interests her, but not as much.

So, our year opens with lots of potential and we pray that we will all make it a good year!


Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

What A Long Strange Day It's Been....

I cannot remember how I started my day.... 

Oh yeah, a friend came over to do some "shopping" (I'll post more about that later....).  She left with a suitcase full of clothes for her younger boys.  YAY!!

My son got a late start (no great surprise there -- he was exhausted from yesterday's tiyul).  I got a little annoyed about how late he actually got up, but I managed to let my frustration go. I even made him lunch, so he left feeling good that his mother "took care of him."  It is such a funny stage -- he wants to be independent, but he also wants to be pampered.  Finding the right balance is.... challenging!

An hour later, another friend came over to treat me to shiatsu.*  What a pleasure!  I have been feeing overwhelmed and stressed for several days.  I felt so relaxed when she finished treating me!

Then I met with my "narrative therapist."  We have met several times already and I am still not sure exactly what "narrative therapy" is, but I find the sessions with her insightful.  (And she comes to my home, so it could not be easier!)  She asks probing questions that make me think.  My purpose in meeting with her, is to use our meetings to reach my concrete goal of getting my house in order (primarily decluttering, but also organizing....).  Today we mainly "caught up," after not meeting for several weeks.  She also helped me to refocus on my ultimate goal.

In the middle of our session, I got hungry.  That has not happened for the longest time!!

I actually ate some real food and enjoyed it.  I had a small piece of eggplant parmesan, a small slice of carrot cake, and a tall glass of milk.  I was still hungry afterwards, so I ate some honey roasted peanuts.  Not bad for someone who has not had an appetite for 10 months! 

A few hours later, I ate an early dinner with my two younger kids.  I had a bowl of soup and corn on the cob, with butter and salt.  What a simple pleasure to sit and eat with my kids!

I really enjoyed spending the time together.

Unfortunately, I am now paying the piper....  My stomach is grumbling and acting up again.

Perhaps I should have eaten toast with jam, but that is so boring!!   I wanted yummy food.

It was a very surrealistic day, slow, kind of wierd feelings. 

My daughter had her Kfitz Kfotz gymnastics presentation this evening.  This year, they did a local presentation, which I really appreciated.  It was much easier for me to attend a shorter program that was close to home.

When we arrived home, my son was already in bed, and on his way to never-never-land.  Before I left, we discussed what time he should eat supper and go to bed, given how tired he was this morning.  I am pleased that he demonstrated responsibility and made sure to go to bed on time.  I am proud of him.

My daughter also had a few thoughts to share about her day.  She raised several issues that were disturbing her, primarily about certain dynamics at her school.  I tried to guide her a bit, but mostly I just listened.  I am glad she feels she can talk to me.

Today is my eldest's birthday.  She was not home all day.  I missed her.  My youngest was especially disappointed that her sister would not be around to celebrate her birthday.  My youngest is always very diligent about making something nice for our birthdays.  She clearly felt disappointed that her sister would not be receiving her gifts on her actual birthday. My youngest and I sang Happy Birthday to my eldest over the phone. We will celebrate more with her over Shabbat.

My kids are all growing up so fast....



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

--------------------------------------------------------
* In addition to practicing Shiatsu professionally, Idit volunteers her services to me and to the Yuri Stern Foundation.

Idit has a wonderful, warm, and relaxing treatment room in her home.
  
For regular treatments or to treat yourself to something special:
Idit Amir
077-757-8949
052-660-8442
Idit Amir amir.idit@gmail.com

Counting My Blessings (reviewing this past week)

******  warning: long post  ******

So many good things have happened this past week.  I have been too busy to sit down and write!

The day of my PET CT, a good friend, BW, who I do not get to see that often, came to spend the day with me. The intake nurse was a real character; she explained everything in great detail and added a lot of humor to the day. My friend brought lots of great games for us to play, but we did not get a chance to play any of them. We were too busy talking... and sewing. Together we sewed up two major items of clothing for my daughters. After I finished at the hospital, my friend accompanied me (i.e. chauffeured me around town) on a myriad of errands. It was so great to accomplish so much in one day!

Oh yeah, did I mention that when she arrived, she brought three containers of food for my family! She stuck them in the fridge as a matter of course. (get it? as a matter of course??  -- good thing I amuse myself!)

I was tired from all the running around and I knew I had a big day the next day.  Thursday, my youngest daughter's school would be celebrating Yom Yerushalayim, including the "mayatzim" (madrichei yerushalayim tzeirim -- your Jerusalem tour guides) project.  My daughter, along with a team of her 6th grade classmates, would be guiding us on a three hour tour of Ir David (The City of David).  Then, following a communal meal (falafel), we would watch performances of all the younger grades.  Even before I had cancer, this event would leave me both energized (it's such a great program!) and exhausted (it is so tiring!!)!

I planned to rest all Wednesday night and Thursday morning, so I would have enough stamina to get through the big day.

Wednesday night, I had difficulty falling asleep.  My stomach had been bothering since the morning, and it was still churning.  For the first time since I began treatment, I had non-stop diarrhea.  All day, I took pills (Imodium) to stop the diarrhea.  They did not work.  I passed the 6 pill mark, when I was supposed to call my doctor (he was out of the country)… and then the 8 pill mark, when I was supposed to go to the hospital.  I never want to go to the hospital in the middle of the night; but that night would have totally messed me up for the next day!  I needed to sleep.

I was not dehydrated. I had been diligently drinking all day. I even drank a milkshake, to get in some calories and free radicals (salts and sugars). I felt fine. My stomach just would not cooperate.

At around midnight, I called my neighbor, who is also an oncologist (I actually have two neighbors/friends who are top-notch oncologists).  I knew if I called the "on-call," I would be instructed to go straight to the hospital.  I really felt that was unnecessary, but I did not want to be irresponsible.  So I consulted with my neighbor/friend/local oncologist, who I hoped would give me an answer that was not "by the book."  He confirmed that I could stay home and, if need be, I could go to the hospital in the morning, get an IV, and rest there (an option far better than going in the middle of the night!).  Neither option turned out to be necessary.  I had one more episode, after which I was finally able to fall asleep. 

It was not until the next day, when I was feeling a lot better, that I learned that my friend's intention was that I would go straight to the hospital if I had another episode. Thankfully, all's well that ends well.  I was fine the next day and able to rest in my own home, and gather strength for that afternoon's event. 

However, my restless stomach from the day before made me nervous.  I knew there would be no bathrooms once we started the tour, so I popped two pills, "just to be safe," as we left the house.  I am happy to report that I had no problems that day.  Thank God!!

That afternoon, we arrived right on time!  As soon as we got there, I could feel the excitement in the air.  The sixth graders were all in their mayatzim shirts, with voice amplifiers, guiding and directing the parents.

My daughter did such a great job leading our tour group!!  Who would have imagined that just a few years ago, this girl barely spoke above a whisper?  Here she was, full of confidence, reciting her script loudly and clearly.  It was definitely one of those proud parenting moments.

I was impressed by her entire team.  Not just by their excellent presentations, but by the way they worked together, in harmony, making sure everyone had what they needed, stood where they were supposed to, and did not forget what to say.  They did a fantastic job!

My son was in his element as well.  He and another boy from his class had spent several days making sure that their classmates would attend.  They succeeded in gathering almost all the kids from their class and they had a grand old time together.  My son almost blew us off to hang out with his friends, but my eldest convinced him to stay with our group.  I was glad he chose to stay with us.  I enjoy his company (and his help carrying my bag!).

Before the performances, the parents' committee thank the teacher who teaches the kids about Jerusalem from the time they begin school, culminating in this final project.  I was honored to present her with flowers and a class shirt.  It felt fitting to end our tenure at the school this way.

This year is the last year that I will have a child in this school. This was the last time I would attend the Yom Yerushalayim (Jerusalem Day) celebrations. Next year, all my children would go on their own, with their classmates. They would not need me for this anymore. I looked around me, trying to soak it all in.

The shows ended and all the bogrim (graduates) were invited to join the current students on stage, for the "school song."  There they were, all three of my "babies," on stage, embraced by friends and community. My youngest daughter had a huge smile on her face; she knew her class did a great job and the hardest part of 6th grade was over.  My son, surrounded by all his old friends, also had a huge smile on his face as he waved an Israeli flag high over the heads of his classmates.  And my eldest, who also reunited with her classmates, was so free and childlike, dancing with her friends and laughing.  They were home.

The evening ended relatively early.  As the energy slowly dissipated, we made our way home and into bed.

The next day, our youngest two slept in, our eldest went to school, Moshe went to this course he is taking at Ir David, and I went to our friends' daughter's Bat Mitzvah celebration at Nalaga'at, in Jaffa Port.  All the waiters and servers were deaf.  In the middle, they gave a brief "lesson" in sign language.  It was really fun and very interesting. 

That Shabbat, we hosted two girls from Mitzpah Yericho, as part of Shabbat Yerushalayim.  All the youth groups in Jerusalem host kids from other branches, who do not live in Jerusalem.  During the day, after lunch, they all walk to the Kotel where they meet all the other religious kids from the country!!  It is a HUGE "happening!"

The walk takes about an hour and a half from where we live, but the kids never miss it!  There are buses after Shabbat, to take them home.

We hosted dinner in the evening.  Lunch, the kids ate with their youth group and we ate with good friends of ours.  We were three families at lunch, but since most of our kids were with their youth groups, it was actually a very small meal.  We were three "grown ups" (who are all pretty childlike) and five kids (out of 9).  It was fun!

After lunch, I collapsed into bed and slept for hours!  I needed that!

Sunday and Monday were rather mundane.  I had a great experience teaching swimming, but I'll post about that separately.  And, here we are, Tuesday, ever Chag HaShavuot. 

Chag Sameach!!  (Happy Holiday!)



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA

The BEST mood!

What can I say? Chemo was so much fun today!!

First of all, I started off the day in a GREAT mood.

I went to sleep late and woke up early, yet I was still full of energy! My guess is that I was feeling the after-effects of the laughter workshop!

When I arrived at chemo, I saw RE, who I have not seen for a long time (she's my friend, who runs the hadracha (informal education) center at Tel Shilo). We both changed chemo days and now we do not overlap at all. So it was great to see her and have a chance to catch up!

As we were talking, my oncologist snagged me to come into his office. I got nervous, because we were not scheduled to meet today, but he just wanted to take two minutes to share the results of my MRI. Everything is stable, Baruch HaShem!! (Thank God)

When I went to stake out a chair in the day room, several people greeted me enthusiastically. What a great feeling!! I spent a few minutes chatting with each one, and then went to open my port.

Once again, the nurse drew blood easily. What a bracha! (blessing) For almost a full year, it took almost 15-20 minutes to draw blood from my port -- and that is when the port worked! Almost 50% of the time (maybe more), I had to get blood drawn from a vein because the port only worked "one way" -- you could put stuff in, but you could not get anything out! Something shifted during these last two months and the port has been working as it should!! Chasdei HaShem! (God is good!! -- ok, that is not an exact translation, but you get the idea)

After that, I had a wonderful foot massage to relieve some of the pressure in my feet and legs from swelling caused by the chemo. (Thanks to the Yuri Stern Foundation)

After my massage, I sat for a few minutes with N, another friend from chemo who I have not seen in a long time.

Then today's chemo date arrived! I have not seen my friend HND for a long time! Our schedules just don't match up! But she is about to move up north and we both really wanted a chance to hang out before her move. As always, our conversation covered a broad range of topics and was really interesting!

In the middle of the day, when the ward was starting to empty out, one of the nurses, who is a real character, sat down on one of the chairs for "story hour." Yesterday, a patient gave her a printout of one of those cute anecdotes circulating the internet these days (The Story of the Ceramic Tea Cup and its Maker) and she decided to share it with us, translated into Hebrew, of course.

Just as she began the tale, the couple who comes each week to deliver food from Ezer MiZion arrived.

How can I describe this couple? First, you need to know that the "typical" volunteers for Ezer MiZion are gentle Hareidi (ultra-Orthodox) women in their late fifties, or older, who speak softly and tend to be very demure. Not this couple. They are probably in their forties, but maybe in their early fifties -- I used to be good at estimating ages, but not any more. It does not matter; their age is irrelevant. They are certainly young at heart!

What sets these volunteers apart is the husband, who has a booming personality!! He is tall, wears a large white kippah typical of hippie dati leumi (national religious) types, and his presence just fills the room with joy!! (He makes me look quiet!!) Both the husband and the wife have large, warm smiles, and they take a bit of time to talk and joke with the patients. Just writing about them makes me smile!!

Today, they mentioned that they are going on vacation for a month. They will be spending a week in Orlando. Disneyworld and Universal Studios are my favorite places in the world!!! I could spend a month in those parks and not get tired of the rides!! Not to mention all the REALLY NICE people who work there!!! So, I spent some time with them describing the different parks and rides, and sharing tips for how to maximize their time. It was nice to be able to give back something to these special people who brighten up my day each week. (At least, I hope my suggestions were helpful. We'll find out when they return.)

I admit I am a bit jealous. I REALLY want to go to Orlando with my kids now, while they are still young enough to enjoy vacationing with their parents. (and while my health is still good enough that I can go on ALL the rides!!)

After the couple left, the nurse continued with her "story hour."

The whole thing was just so funny!!

After chemo, on our way out, we met S&AG, who were hanging out in the coffee shop. We hung out with them for a while, catching up. AG is always involved in really cool and unusual projects. S&AG were advisors when I was in NCSY. I was a S "groupie" -- I always attended any session she led. She was, and is, a fantastic educator and role model! I wonder if she knows how much I admired her. (if she reads this post, she will know now!)

When we left the hospital, I was not tired, so I accompanied my friend on an errand and then she came over for a quick cup of coffee.

Not long after she left, my kids came home. They were all excited about having sold almost everything they brought to the shuk kach-ten ("give and take" market) -- the kids bring things to barter and "sell" for special school made money. My kids had a table together and cooperated so that they could each get what they wanted.

I find it fascinating to see what interests my kids from year to year. Sometimes they just get junk that they tire of in a few days, but sometimes they get things they really want. For example, my son got a fun baseball cap that he likes, and that he can use for tiyulim (hikes). This year he lost several hats we had that he liked, so I am pleased that he found a hat that suits him. Hopefully he will keep this one for a while. (I am not holding my breath)

My daughter waited patiently for her turn to share her treasures. She watched as my son slowly took out eat item and showed off his finds. Then she did the same, slowly exhibiting each item, saving her favorites for last.

By the time they were done, so was I. It was a long day.

But both kids still needed more attention. My son was in one of those moods where he was still hungry but would not finish the food he had. And my daughter wanted me to sit with her and fix all the typos in her English project.

I would have been happy to hand over the reins to Moshe, but he went to Shavua HaSefer (The Book Festival) again, for the third time.

I could not even turn to my eldest for help, since she is away for the night. Her school decided to have an overnight tiyul (trip) for the last two days of school.

In the end, I just sent my kids to get ready for bed. My son grumbled the whole time about being hungry but when I went in to talk with him about what happened he was already asleep! My daughter also would have been happy to play around for longer, but it was 8:30 and time for bed!

As soon as the house quieted down, my good mood returned.

I planned to go out tonight to celebrate a friend's birthday. If Moshe were home, I probably would have gone, especially if we would have gone together (read: if he drove). But by the time the kids were in bed and asleep, I realized it was too much! I might have been able to drive there, but I did not want to drive home late at night.

I had a great day, but my energy has finally waned. I am tired. The good kind of tired. The way you feel after a really great day.

Isn't it funny? Today was a chemo day, but it was a really great day.

Fancy that!



Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.

With love and optimism,
RivkA