I went for a CT today.
I don't get the iodine injection, since I am now allergic to iodine. And, half-way through the disgusting barium drink, I was told that it wasn't necessary to drink any more. So, the process was much easier than in the past.
My mom kept me company, which was nice.
We finished so early, we decided to go visit our friend, in the oncology ward.
We went up to her room and she wasn't there.
Her bed was empty (without sheets, even) and there did not seem to be any personal effects.
I went to the nurse's desk. "Where's S?" I asked, uncertain if she had changed rooms or if the family had decided to take her home.
"Who are you?" asked the nurse.
"Friends," I answered.
"You'd better speak with her daughters," the nurse answered.
I asked another question, and the nurse repeated: "you should speak with her daughters."
I thought to myself, she must have gotten worse, so they decided to take her home.
On our way out, I met someone else who works there, and knows me as well.
She told me directly.
S passed away this morning, a few hours earlier.
It was so fast. Her diagnosis, her deterioration, her death.
Cancer is really a horrible disease.
I am different.
I have a different type of cancer.
My cancer is responding to treatment.
I am young.
I am strong.
I have a great attitude.
Blah, blah, blah....
Please daven (or send happy, healing thoughts) for RivkA bat Teirtzel.
With love and optimism,
Should I Take The Plunge? Do I Want it Enough?
2 hours ago