tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2782551808324372235.post5999018546655631253..comments2024-03-12T10:20:01.684+02:00Comments on Coffee and Chemo: Giving and ReceivingRivkA with a capital Ahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09411034058195730044noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2782551808324372235.post-12917164300399635282008-08-07T20:54:00.000+03:002008-08-07T20:54:00.000+03:00anon -- I appreciate your comments so much.I could...anon -- I appreciate your comments so much.<BR/><BR/>I could write so much about husbands, help, and support.... <BR/><BR/>You would have enjoyed the discussion in our support group.<BR/><BR/>Why are you not allowed to drive? My chemo dates usually drive me home, but I drive everywhere else. I can't imagine how challenging it must be to have to rely on friends for everything! (and I rely on friends for a lot!!)<BR/><BR/>I also try to make things entertaining for the friends who come with me. Most of the time, when we do things together, it is fun!<BR/><BR/>Some of the less fun activities sometimes fall by the wayside... and that's ok too (mostly).RivkA with a capital Ahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09411034058195730044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2782551808324372235.post-75634329144546864262008-08-07T05:29:00.000+03:002008-08-07T05:29:00.000+03:00RivkA: totally understand what you are saying. Le...RivkA: totally understand what you are saying. Learning to be gracious and accept help is one of the hardest lessons I have learned since I was diagnosed six years ago. I was always the one doing the helping, and to admit to needing help seems demoralizing and weak at first.<BR/><BR/>It took me quite some time to understand that the opportunity to help and do a mitzvah gave great pleasure to my friends. It is not weak, it is being strong to accept help.<BR/><BR/>My husband still has the greatest difficulty accepting help as he seems to feel that it implies that he couldn't do whatever it is for me. <BR/>But I am no longer allowed to drive, and I need people to help me get around - to the hospital for treatment - or just to buy a new dress. The 'girls' who help me actually enjoy these outings, and we try to turn them into fun. No one person could possibly do everything that I need doing, and my husband has been incredible in looking after me, and holding down a very full time responsible job. I just wish he too could accept help gracefully when it is generously and caringly offered!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2782551808324372235.post-72558132865732074922008-08-01T16:07:00.000+03:002008-08-01T16:07:00.000+03:00ALN -- thanks.I've been thinking about what it mea...ALN -- thanks.<BR/><BR/>I've been thinking about what it means to be a "receiver" vs. a "taker"RivkA with a capital Ahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09411034058195730044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2782551808324372235.post-49822643955551295162008-07-29T17:24:00.000+03:002008-07-29T17:24:00.000+03:00Wow, RivkA, what amazing timing. What a big piece...Wow, RivkA, what amazing timing. What a big piece, the process of changing your life-long approach, and whole identity, adding "receiver" to your long list of "Who am I?" <BR/><BR/>How I can relate to the independence thing... but I can only imagine some of the challenges it brings.<BR/><BR/>Strength...<BR/><BR/>ALNThe Five + of Ushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14673803854699604232noreply@blogger.com